How We See Ourselves Versus How Others Experience Us
Share
You push through all the people at a crowded train station - you are focused, moving fast and just trying to make your train like everyone else. To you, it's survival. To the person you brushed past, you're just another aggressive commuter shoving their way through.
Same moment. Two completely different stories.
This gap, between how we experience ourselves and how we are perceived by other people, is one of the quiet root causes behind a lot of misunderstandings, in relationships, at work, even with strangers on a train. Most of the time, we never find out it exists at all.
What Happens When We Never Check
Left alone, this gap doesn't stay neutral. It quietly shapes how people see us at work, how partners read each other's silences, and how friendships drift because of an assumption that was never actually said out loud. Most people go years without ever finding out how they're really experienced by the people closest to them.
A Game Built Around This Exact Question
Personify, a narrative art therapy game from Kare Collective, was built to close that gap on purpose.
It's designed for two people, using drawing instead of conversation to get somewhere words often can't. With every prompt, both players draw their interpretation of the other, how they love, what they're passionate about, what they avoid, what makes them laugh and what they'll be remembered for. By the end, each canvas becomes a quiet, visual record of how you actually see each other.
It comes with 2 canvases, 12 markers and 30 prompt cards, and it's built for anyone 14 years and up: couples, close friends, siblings and others.
How to Play
- Each player takes a canvas.
- Shuffle the 30 prompt cards and place them face down.
- Take turns drawing a card and reading the prompt aloud.
- Both players draw their answer, about the other person, adding to the canvas with every round.
- Keep going until the deck runs out. Your finished canvas is the story of how you see each other.
There's no right answer to a prompt. The value is in comparing what you drew to what the other person expected, and talking about where those pictures match, and where they don't.
Why This Matters More Than a Conversation Would
Talking about how you're perceived can feel confrontational, like you're building a case. Drawing takes the edge off. It's playful by design, which makes it easier to be honest, and often surprisingly accurate about things that don't usually get said out loud. Not to mention, it can also lead to lots of play, fun moments and laughs!
